• any therapist:  have you considered...
• me:  i'm like 50 metaconsciousness levels past this bob jesus christ

teamcaptains:

i.
I don’t miss you but I miss loving you, and sometimes when I read poems that woman in Montmartre wrote I find myself stretching my legs out on the faux fur rug the way your cat used to. Aging is a funny thing. I don’t think much about high school football or college trysts anymore. I remember the California boulevards and the vanishing taillights–and everything–but memories like that don’t knock me over like they did when I was twenty-one, as if I’m in some celestial space now where that whole arc can’t ruin me. Still, I miss loving you; I’ve said this. I miss finding a palette of all my favorite colors in a person, and writing poems about you in the kitchen in summer. Now that I’m alone, it’s all different. Think: cigar smoke. Court documents. A plane ticket to Italy. A Caravaggio. Wild love, but a different kind.

ii.
Someday my life will be cinematic, I used to say. I wish you or someone could have seen me, walking in the woods dressed like a character in an old film. The air smelled sweet, earthy. I could make out the faint ghosts of foxes and deer. Your father’s rifle flashed in my brain as usual, for I am always thinking about it, always recalling that polished and sleek form. I imagined some dark figure elsewhere in the woods holding it and aiming it at me. I could have died and not cared; I would rise again, somehow, because I mattered to someone.

iii.
Flowers should have figured into this but they didn’t. They came after–after the dizzying adventures in your black Yukon, after the trip to the sea with all those watchful stars, after your mother’s quiet death in Argentina. The tea kettle hissed one day and I thought: flowers. For the garden and the breakfast table. I did not question it. I did not think of magic. It was not, and never would be, about magic.

• Draco:  literally fuck every gryffindor ever... you can't trust them for shit
• Draco 3 mins later:  nvm he texted back

infj-fish:

Yeah um I already played out this confrontation like 10 times in my head so if you could stick to the script I imagined for you, that’d be great, thanks.

chandelyer:

Alena Akhmadullina prefall 2017

in-pursuit-of-fitness:

sylvysparrow:

how hard does this damn tweet go though

This. Right here. You come first.

imanes:

where does this need to overshare come from…. why am I like this…. why can’t I be mysterious

where to take the signs on a date 

thenatalchart:

fishzodiac:

uranus-energy:

pmoth:

astropelican:

aries: concert
taurus: restaurant
gemini: theme park
cancer: hell
leo: movies
virgo: bookstore
libra: museum
scorpio: cafe
sagittarius: hiking
capricorn: theatre
aquarius: observatory
pisces: aquarium

oh okay i get it. just cause im a pisces i wanna go to a fuckng aquarium. fuck you, i dont want to go to a fucking aquarium for a date. who the fuck wrote this shit list im going to kick your ass. you think just cause my sign is two stupid fucking fish that i wanna see a bunch of other stupid fuckng fishes dying and breathing in poopwater in big glass cages no fuck you. no i dont wanna do that. why scorpio and taurus and gemini get all this fun shit but i gotta be a fuckin fish stuck in fish hell. u know waht im just gonna come out and say it: i ahte swimming. i hate swimming. i havent liked swimming ever and the fact that im a ppisces mean every1 gonna assume i like 2 swim but u know what. i dont like to swim. im so sick of all this water shit from these zodiacs i mean god damn in the pokemon one which type is pisces gonna be ITS WATER DID U THINK IT WOULDNT BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN FUCKIGN WATER of course its water i didnt even have 2 look at that goddam fuckin pokemon one cause i knew pisces was gonna be shitty water. why is pisces the one thats always water anyways. aquarius was water IN THE name (aqua) and that spanish for water so why the fuck isnt aquarius the sign thats in water hell why it gotta be me. fuck this shit whoever made this shitty date shit fuck u im never going to an aquarium again

reblogging it for the angry pisces

I remember when this happened

onderon:

notastupidbird:

onderon:

the force is like anxiety

explain

with me, always

etherealskull:

Sext: RUDIMENTARY CREATURE OF BLOOD AND FLESH, YOU TOUCH MY DICK, FUMBLING IN IGNORANCE, INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING

tainico:

2017 is the year of unapologetic rage and rebirth

australiansanta:

a fun and interesting fact about me is that im a fucking idiot

• me [searching the beach with my child]:  sorry honey, doesn't look like there's any sand dollars left
• child:  can't the ocean just make more of them?
• me:  and cause inflation? destroy the sand economy? jesus christ Tiffany, use your head

hello